My Other Story
Monday, June 7, 2010 at 8:50AM Yesterday at church I was asked to tell “My Story.” Now I am very comfortable talking about my diabetes story to all of you all the time. I try to do it almost daily but my faith story and how I finally accepted God into my life is a story I have not told here. So I figured since I could tell it in church I should share it will you too.
Now I was not raised in the church. At a very young age my grandmother taught me the Lord's prayer but that was all the religion I knew. My grandma was one of those people that praised God when the sun came out and when it rained. She was always saying "God bless you" to me and my sisters and I always thought it was strange since it was not always after a sneeze. I knew about God but I did not know him. In fact, when I got older, I was the first to debate His existence. I would argue that the bible was just a book of stories that contradicted itself time and time again but the whole time I had never even opened a bible. I can only look back and think that it was fear that made me act that way. Fear of conforming or fear of the unknown. I am not sure. Maybe it was because my life had been rough and didn't think I saw God's grace in it.
When I was just out of high school my father died. He was 43 years old and seemed to be in good health. I was very close to my Dad and still miss him everyday. It was a difficult time for me since I was just going to move out of the house and begin my life. Now my role model was gone. I was so angry and sad all at once that I turned to alcohol and drugs to numb the pain. For months I was secretly passing out each night instead of going to sleep. I would spend my nights alone with a bottle of booze instead of going out with friends or visiting family. Nothing mattered to me except numbing the pain of a broken heart. I felt like a part of me was gone and that there was this gaping hole in me.
Then one day I came up with a plan. I figured the only way I was going to fill this void was to find someone who would be a father figure to me. Surely one of my friend’s dad's would adopt me and treat me as his own. But that never happened. It was pretty pathetic. I would visit my friends houses and spend more time chatting with their parents then my friends! Needless to say, it didn't work.
Then I started dating a girl who would later become my wife. She had an uncle who I really connected with and we became good friends. He was very involved in his church but I didn't mind much. I just ignored it when he would bring God up since it was a small price to pay for this new father figure in my life. He would invite me to bible studies and stuff and I would always have an excuse. For years this went on and I never gave in.
Then one day he called me up and invited me to go to this 2 day men's convention thing called Promise Keepers. Have any of your ever heard of that? He told me it was church thing but I figured, I owe it to him since I always flake. Plus, it would be cool just to hang out with him. So I agreed.
What happened at that event was life changing. The first day I stuck to him like glue. I was terrified. I was listening to the speakers but felt very uncomfortable. Like a stinging in my stomach that I could not identify. I felt like crying. That night I told my fiance a little about the experience. She didn't ask too much about it becuase she could tell that I did not want to talk about it much.
At around noon the second day I felt this feeling I had not felt in a long time. In fact, at first I could not even pinpoint the feeling. It was like something inside me was whole again. Like my heart was not void of the spot my dad filled. I told my wife's uncle that I was going to go for a walk and went back into the stadium to hear some musicians playing. When I was standing there on the floor of the Colussium it hit me. Like rain pouring over me I could feel the Holy Spirit filling me up. The pain of my dad's death was gone. It was as if I was finally complete and could now begin my life. I understood that I will and have always had a father. God is and will always be my father and when that realization hit me, so did the fact that tears were pouring down my face. I hadn't felt so totally safe, so complete, and so happy before in my life and I had only God to thank.
I knew at that point that I would praise the Lord when the sun shined and when the rain fell. I would thank Him for all of life's struggles knowing that with His help, I can handle anything.
And that is my "other story.
Reader Comments (12)
This is a beautiful story, George. I often wonder how people without a belief in God get thru life. There are plenty of struggles, but it's such a relief to know I'm not doing it alone. I, too, have accepted God as my Father, both spiritually and physically, and also asked Him to fill many emotional voids in my life that people have left vacant. People always disappoint, in some way, but God never does. Being a Christian doesn't make you "better" than other people, just "better off". Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for sharing your story, George. Very inspiring and I'm thankful to have had that chance. I have my own story, but much more recently than yours and not stemming from anythig such as you've experienced. In so many ways, He allows us to find him when His time is right - on His own time, not ours or anyone elses. And the path isn't always straight or connected, but we must have faith that we'll get to where we're supposed to when the path comes to a close.
I love this post, George. I really enjoy hearing about people's moments of religious enlightenment, as I'm not one of strong faith myself. You inspire me, SuperG.
Have been reading your blog for a bit now after my 6 year old daughter was diagnosed with Type 1 last November. Thanks for sharing your 'other' story today! I'm a pastor, and it's been our faith that has helped my wife and I walk through Aubrey's diagnosis and the daily struggles of diabetes.
Grateful for you sharing your life thru this blog...
that was very uplifting-thanks for sharing that. Physical parents may disappoint(and fail), but its great to know that God never does. He is a father to the fatherless.
INSPIRING post on so many levels G- Thanks for sharing!!
Kelly K
Psalm 68:5 "Father to the fatherless, defender of widows—this is God, whose dwelling is holy."
Thank you so much for posting your story, George. I grew up in church and have been in church all of my life, so I've always known about God. But it is completely different to know about Him and to know Him. Isn't it wonderful when you KNOW Him??
Even though I'm far from religious, I'm finding myself becoming more spiritual with all my health woes of the past few months. (Was it the great white light when I was so sick? I don't know.)
Anyways, I understand people who have experiences like yours more than I used to. Thank you for sharing it.
I am like a few other posters - in being that I am not highly religious - but I do see the effects it has on people who take it into their hearts. I sometimes wonder if it's too late in my life to join up - have been looking into it - just haven't found the right religion yet - as there are a few that I really find interesting in their beliefs. Today when I go out, I'll have an even bigger smile after reading your "other story". Thanks so much for sharing George - it makes us all come closer I think.
I loved hearing your story George. I always find it to be a blessing when I find a fellow Christian. And when it's one as cool as Ninjabetic who shares diabetes w/ me it's even better. :) And isn't it nice to know we have Someone who will be able to fill the most empty of holes in our lives? I'm so thankful for that.
praise God for your uncle-in-law!! i'm so glad you shared your other story here, NinjaB : ) just as diabetes intertwines every nook and cranny of our lives, so too does faith. it is such a witness to God's love and faithfulness when someone with a chronic disease/problem/issue shares that faith inspite of...
thank you!
I love this story man. I loved it when you told it to me in person, and I love it again reading it here.