Love "Live!"

Every Thursday night I am privileged to co-host DSMA Live on Blog Talk Radio with my good friends Scott Johnson and Cherise Shockley. What makes the show so awesome besides the great questions from the Twitter chat the night before, the great listeners who connect and comment through out the show in the chat room, the always awesome guest, or the live phone calls is the fact that it is Live! And because it is live we never quite know what is going to happen or where the show is going to go.

Take last night’s show for instance.

The DSMA Questions were all about support, namely the people who support us. Some refer to them as Type 3’s but some just call them their D-Peeps. I have decided to adopt Type Awesome! Thanks Kim for that one. ;)

The guest for the show was Rachel from TalesOfRachel.com and we were having a great time going through the questions one by one.

One question was, “What do you share and what do you fear sharing with non PWoD's?”

When we all answered this question the subject of depression came up. Some of us feared sharing moments of depression or times we were down.

That was then the show changed.

We began exploring the challenge of living with diabetes and depression. How often it seems to drop its dark cloud over our lives and how it can make us feel alone. The very real stigma about having depression or any mental illness and how hard it is to get the help you need. Not because there is not help because it is difficult for many to seek it.

It was a topic that needed to be discussed or at least that is why I believe we sort of switched gears. One thing led us into another and it was done so organically that it just felt right. Sometimes the thing we are talking about is not the thing we need to be talking about. Only a format like this really gives us that freedom

I love it. I love LIVE!

Full Moon

I should not be complaining. I’m not really. It’s just that it has become a problem.

I’m a sagger.

You know, one of those dudes who always has his pants hanging off the back of his butt. No matter what I try, I sag.

My belt has been tightened and just when I think it’s all good I walk around and down they go. Kind of like a magician slipping out of handcuffs or something. My waste just starts slithering out of my pants.

That sounds awful. HA!

Maybe a shopping trip is in order? I would really rather wait until I lose more weight. I keep dropping pounds but I am no where near where I should be. But the fact that everyone around me knows what color boxer shorts I am wearing on any given day makes it seem like buying at least pants that fit should be a priority.

My shirts have become like tents too. In fact, the other night I wore a shirt I have not worn in about a year. That felt so awesome.

About 2 weeks ago I bought a pair of swim trunks for the new pool. Not wanting to waste time I got the biggest size I could find because not too long ago that would have fit perfectly. Well, after tying the draw string as tight as possible I dove in and lets just say, I am glad no one was underwater with a camera. So again, not complaining but it is a problem when there is a full moon in the pool because I dove in with saggy shorts on.

All of the credit I give to Victoza and the way it helps me curb my appetite. I will say that listening to my body and stopping eating when I am satisfied is another thing I am doing. I know my calorie intake has probably dropped in half because of it. I let the Victoza help and I stop when I am done, not when the food is gone.

Some would say that losing weight with the help of a drug is not healthy or cheating. I would want nothing more than to have the willpower and the drive to exercise all the time and eat right all the time. But I don’t so if this helps than so be it.

If someone wanted to quit smoking and failed trying cold turkey, would you tell them NOT to use the patch?

The patch helped me quit smoking.

Help is not a bad thing.

Full moon's in the pool however, are!

Community Matters

When we sit alone we wonder,

Who could understand?

Why am I am the only one?

When will it end?

Can I get through this?

What if I give up?

Will anyone care?

Do I matter?

When we sit together we hear,

I understand.

You are not alone.

We will get through it together.

Lean on me.

Cry on my shoulder.

I care.

You matter.

You Tube Tuesday #220

For those of you who are my friends on Facebook you may have already seen this but I really felt the need to share it here.

My son gave the Easter Morning sermon during our church's Sunrise service. The sound isn't great but I think the message is. 

Enjoy!

So Sick Of This

Friday sickness made me give in and head into the doctors office. Unfortunately my doctor was not in so I went to see the doctor I have through my wife’s insurance. One of those big HMO group things where you walk in and there are hundreds of people everywhere waiting to see someone.

First off I was really surprised at how quickly I was called in to see the doctor. I assume it was because it was Good Friday and everyone just wanted to cut out of there as soon as possible. Let’s just say it was so fast that I didn’t even get to snap a picture in the waiting room for the Waiting with Diabetes group on Flickr.

The nurse had me step on the scale which showed a number that I am sure was about 20 pounds lower than it should have been. Unless I lost 20 pounds and it doesn’t show anywhere on my body than this scale was wrong. I was a little perturbed because I would have liked to have known what my actual weight was. Oh well.

When I got into the exam room the nurse took my vitals and asked me if I was taking any prescriptions. I pulled out my iPhone and started the Notes app because I have a page where I list all the drugs I take. When I started rattling them off she stopped, looked at me, and said, “are those all for diabetes?”

“Well the Lisinopril is for blood pressure. The Lipitor is for cholesterol. The Terbinfine is for toenail fungus…” As I was saying all this she just stared at the screen and didn’t type in anything! So I just stopped. She wasn’t putting anything in the computer so why waste my breath. Not to mention that my throat was on fire and talking hurt.

When the doctor came in she said, “Wow we have not seen you in here since 2003. Are you seeing someone about your diabetes?”

“Yes, I have another doctor that I see (AWESOME DOCTOR BY THE WAY) about my diabetes.”

“Oh good because I know you came in here about a cold but I am more concerned your diabetes.”

She seemed nice enough and frankly when I was here before the doctor never looked at my chart so this seemed pretty good. “Yeah I am doing fine.”

“Well, you really need to stay on top of it. I mean, you are only 38 and you already have diabetes! You need to keep your A1C below 7 to avoid complications and be around for a long time.”

So here we go. The fat latino looking guy comes in with diabetes and it just has to be type 2. No offence type 2’s reading this. If I had type 2 I would still be pissed that she just assumed it based on my race and size. I wanted to scream but again my throat hurt and what good would that have done. Get drugs and get to bed. That is the mission. “Yeah I know I have had it for 20 years.”

“I’m sorry to bring it up because I know you are feeling sick but I you need to know. Do you test you blood sugars?”

Are you kidding me? “Yes from 6-8 times a day.”

“And you are on insulin injections?”

“I am on an insulin pump but I have been on insulin since day one.” My face was getting warm. I know it was not a fever but my anger boiling up inside of me.

“Alright well I am going to give you some cough syrup so you can sleep. Get rest, drink plenty of fluids and keep that blood sugar down!” I thought that was it but it went on. “I am going to type up a summary sheet so you can give it to your doctor about what we talked about.”

She handed me the prescription and the summary sheet and I went downstairs to the pharmacy to pick up my drugs. Get drugs, CHECK. Now I need to get to bed!

As I sat waiting for my name to pop up on the pharmacy “Keno” board (that I was it looks like to me) I glanced at the summary sheet the doctor gave me.

Diagnosis: Viral cough and sore throat. Prescribed cough syrup, fluids, and rest. Also discussed uncontrolled DM2.

Excuse me? When did uncontrolled come up? DM2? You mean Diabetes Mellitus type 2?

DING

I look up and see G,SIMMONS on the Keno board. I grab my drugs (check!) and head out the door.

As soon as the automatic doors slid open I spotted the trash can and quickly crumpled up the “summary sheet” and made a shot right before the buzzer. BOOMSHAKALAKA!

Here’s the thing…

NOT ALL TYPE 1’S ARE SKINNY AND NOT ALL TYPE 2’S ARE FAT!

I know people will say that most of the time that is true. Well I don’t assume that just because someone looks Mexican that they can speak Spanish. Or anyone who is tall plays basketball. Or that anyone who is bald has cancer.

Maybe it’s because I am sick. Or maybe it is because I am tired of being told that I am one thing and I know I am not. Either way it is upsetting.